Have I done my job…?
I know how to play you
I know how to keep you in this trap
I know what to do to you but if I reveal it, I won’t be that good of a creator that I think I am.
Will I now?
I know I should not keep it too short, otherwise I lose you or you feel too incomplete and decide not to reengage
You feel there is no context
I know I should not keep it too long because then you might lose interest in me
You might see through my act
You might find that pattern and let it be
You will fail to see what else lies beneath if I complete it all in this long stretch
You will depart and I don’t want that
I want you to stay as long as I want
For that to happen, this piece needs to achieve and find that delicate balance of inquisition, naivety, complexity, delicacy, manipulation by me so that I keep you in this long run
I think I have found it, now I need to test it out and see if it works
If it does, I will continue
If it doesn’t, I re-evaluate, repeat, research and see why you are not deep into it like I am
I do not know for how long it will last but I intend for you to be in this whole ride
Now I have lost that drift and I am wide awake desperate to go back to that slumber that awaits me but you know what to do always don’t you?
You play with me a lot
You trick me and I end up falling to it every god damn time
What have I done?