Amidst​ all the books.

I entered into a beautiful trap. It was a trap right from the start. I knew it but I went in.

At the entrance, it gave me a chance to let go of my worries and I hastily took it to enter the world of words.

Far away from all the crowd, I spotted a small bench and sat down amidst all the books. Every story looked towards me. Everything was within my reach. I felt at peace.

The covers of the book charmed me. I read them front and back. I felt excited!

I  looked and gazed at all the wonders the authors left for me. I fell into an enchanted trap.

Amidst the crowd, I held the two books that caught my eyes.

I sat down in a spot, far away from the eyes of the crowd. I gently opened the first page, admired it, flipped each page and thus I began to read.

After a short while, I looked up at the world around me and I saw it all.

Different worlds under one roof. Any book that I held in my hands, refused to let me go. I refused to be taken away from my world.

Once the thoughts tried to make its way back, I started to get back to my reading. The music played soothed me, yet I got worked up as each page turned by. Time seemed to halt for a long pause when I was here.

Hours could pass by and I never was aware, because it was all a part of an elaborate scheme in works. It was all a beautiful trick, a trick of feeding on my emotions until the very end.

I was oblivious to the happenings of the world and the crowd around me. This was a world where I was persuaded and allowed to take breaks from life.

Perhaps this was why it played its tricks, it could have been its way of acting out on the pain inflicted on taking some of its heart away. Or it wanted some of its heart to be taken away. It might have enjoyed it.

Two sides existed, one can never know which one it chose and which one it was forced to end up being. Or it could have ended up with its favorite choice as well.

This was a world where manipulations and trickery were at its level best and it worked its enchantment quite well.

Those who survived had a gleaming pride on their face because they got to take a huge portion of this world’s heart with them, and for those who couldn’t as much as they liked or couldn’t at all had their hearts toyed with, they had a sliver of hope yet were dismayed.

Over here, hope existed despite all the pain.

Despite all of it, this place took away my worries and sorrows.

It became a place to indulge my mind and heart with the world of others.

It was a place that took me to places further and beyond within and from this spot.

It soon became the time to leave.

The moment I stepped out of the exit, I was forced to head back to a world of ruins and mind succumbing thoughts.

To help cope up, I brought a part of it along with me. It wouldn’t last long, but I accepted it and held it in my hands. I kept it close to my heart vowing to never let go. I sniffed the pages and instantly, I was brought back to a world of beauty and tranquility.

I was a lost traveler until I stepped into your world. No questions arose when I came to you. You are a force that kept pulling me to you and I vow to always be in that loop.

Thank you and until next time.

( The featured image is taken by my dear Friend, Raveena.

This is one of the bookstores I love going to. I wrote this when I was here sitting on one of the spots with two books in my hand. Bookstores and libraries are where I feel at peace and at home. I have this dream when I own a house, a room dedicated just for my books and to every book out there. A room filled with treasures overlooking the view of the skies and tall scrapers and at night, I see all the city lights within the comfort of a book in my hand and some good music. )

Ships, a necessity​.

Ships, my absolute favorite thing in the world. Seeing the couple that I ship makes me so happy and excited!! It’s a different feeling altogether. I have always been a fan of shipping people that I see on shows and movies and even people in reality.

I also ship characters from different multiverses because sometimes, these characters just simply belong together. There is no explanation whatsoever. They just look good or they are similar to each other or it’s the vibes. I don’t know. It feels right.

Many of the ships I have usually never come true because well either the character doesn’t like them, or they die way too soon, or they are just in different shows and movies altogether. But they do come true through dedicated people who put efforts into making these ships happen in their videos.

I also ship characters from books but not as much as shows and movies, because shows and movies are like visual and with the actors acting, it makes it more real and with books, I always tend to focus on the characters and the plot soley. So even if there is romance, I do love it but well it’s different.

Why I suddenly decided to write this was because one of my favorite pass times is to watch videos of people wh I ship online and gosh it gives me hope and immense joy in the world. ( ps: I got inspired to write this after watching stiles and Maya)

The passion, the souls connecting and the music chosen for each ship is what gets me the most. Through such videos, I usually discover such great music and it makes me love my ship even more!!

Some of the ships that I will hardcore love, some of the ships are the ships that I loved at some point, some of them are the ships that I  deeply wish for them to come true are as follows!!! ( PS: I am already hyperventilating and freaking out and I barely haven’t even started writing.

You might also notice that I have used a lot of girl meets world and teen wolf, it’s because those two shows are the shows that I love the most and I find the characters so deep and complex, and through videos made by people, well that’s how many started.

I have also linked down the videos that made me fall in love with all these ships. And when I go back to see this  post, it’s going to fill my heart with John annd excitement of seeing everything I love in one page especially the videos )

“DRUM ROLL” And HERE YOU GO!!!

Stiles (Teen Wolf) And Maya ( Girl Meets World)

I feel that they need to be together because they both are so alike but yet so different. Sarcastic but different. Broken but different yet the same. They both have been hurt way too many times and when it comes to trusting people, they become kind of scared. They are both fragile in different manners. The term friendship means the whole world to them and they are ready to sacrifice anything. I feel that they both would help heal each other and also just be good for each other. Passionate, fun, loving and caring.

There is this one video on youtube that made me love them the most and that’s how I started to love them in the first place. The song used also had a huge impact because that’s one of my favorite songs because of the feelings it gives out.

Scott (Teen Wolf) and Riley ( Girl Meets World)

These two are so alike and sometimes, I find the resemblances shocking and also kind of cute. They always try to see the better in the world and they are filled with hope and faith of the world and the people in it. Friendship means the whole world to them, they are both goofy, silly and happy but at the same time, they are serious when they need to be. Sometimes opposites attract work and sometimes too many similarities would just ruin the spark, I honestly don’t know. It depends if you like the person and they like you and whether you guys can work it out and for a good reason, I know they can. They are good for each other.

The videos on youtube are how I discovered this ship. GAWSH IT’S PERFECT

Theo (Teen Wolf) and Maya ( Girl Meets World)

Honestly, both of them are so badass and I feel that they could challenge each other in different ways. They hardly have any similarities but the similarity that they do is what I feel that makes them different. They both have this danger vibe to their and their chemistry would be really good!!

Riley and Farkle ( Girl Meets Worlds)

THIS WAS THE SHIP THAT NEEDED TO HAPPEN. Both of them were perfect for each other. They understood each other so much and there were a whole other deep level and connection they had. They knew reach other right from the start and have been through it all. The small and the big moments they had were absolute bliss. Both of them goofy, weird, caring but miles apart in the way they think and feel. They both were genuinely good for each other and Gosh how I rooted for this couple to happen.

Josh And Maya (Girl Meets World)

Another couple that we didn’t get to see much of. Honestly, the physical chemistry is what got to me the most but also the talks they had. When they had the talks, damn it was good.

Stiles and Malia ( Teen Wolf)

At the first when they introduced Malia and I like how Stiles was the one to humanize her and teach her many things. Their bond was really good. It was good while it lasted.

Stiles and Lydia ( Teen Wolf)

Honestly, I started shipping them only the moment they had their first kiss in the locker room. The song ” Start Of Time” playing during the scene was how I fell in love with the couple. That was their song. The song was the one that did wonders to me in order to love the couple. They both were there for each other and saved each other many times. They both are smart. Lydia, a supernatural beautiful smart being, and Stiles, an ordinary sarcastic cute wonderful human. They deserve the world. Season 5 was the ultimate season for them.

Barry and Patty ( The Flash)

Gosh, they were so cute!! They both liked each other, had a great time, had a good level of understanding but Barry and his feelings for Iris screwed it up. God Damn, but at least he is happy now. Or is he??

Kara and Winn ( Supergirl )

The ship that I always shipped right from the beginning of the show. Winn is so adorable and the friendship they both shared just made me think about how good they would be if that friendship slowly progressed towards a romantic one. Yes, I do get that some characters are better off as friends and yes I do understand that concept but with Kara and Winn, it was different. I felt that he opened up to her a lot and well, they both look really cute together. Well, at least they are good friends now.

( SIGH )

Monica and Chandler ( Friends)

THIS RELATIONSHIP IS ABSOLUTELY PERFECT IN ALL MANNERS. How chandler handled Monica and he knew how to make her happy and found all her perks cute and handled them pretty damn well and Monica also knew how to cheer Chandler. The speech Chandler gave at the proposal and also to Erica about adopting the baby just made me fall in love with this couple and Chandler even more because it showed how much he truly cared for her and her happiness.

Ted and Tracy ( How I Met Your Mother)

Don’t even get me started on this. LIKE HOW COULD THEY DO THAT TO TRACY?!!! AFTER 9 SEASONS OF MYSTERY, ALL IT TOOK WAS 9 SECONDS FOR THEM TO DO THAT. LIKE WHY?! Tracy and Ted are the most perfect couple. Ted deserved her after all the struggles he went through to find ” THE ONE” AND SHE WAS IT!! She was this kind loving fun human with weird peculiar interests like Ted. The whole gang loved her and in a way she shaped and changed Barney also. They couldn’t be more perfect for each other and then BAM THAT END. FUCK IT.

I DISAPPROVE OF THIS ENDING HOW MUCH EVER YOU TELL ME LIFE IS NOT ALL RAINBOWS AND UNICORN AND WHAT NOT.

I clearly know that. That’s why I watch shows and movies to escape some of my reality cause they are my comfort zone and if you ruin my comfort zone, I can deal with it but just not with this couple.

I SIMPLY CAN’T……. It’s too hard.

Lily and Marshall ( Both from How I Met Your Mother)

The couple that went through it all together through thick and thin. Another couple that is just goals.

Steve and Diana ( Wonder Woman)

GAWD, THIS COUPLE HAD ME SOBBING. STILL SOBBING FROM THIS ONE. WHY DID THAT HAVE TO HAPPEN?! LIKE WHY????????? THEY JUST MET, CLICKED AND BAM, DEAD. NOOOO I WILL NOT ACCEPT THIS. THE CHEMISTRY, GOD DAMNNNN.!.!

Tate and Violet ( American Horror Story)

Oh my gawd, the feels that this couple gave to me. I have never seen any couple so intense and raw. Their character flaws and darkness was what made them “them”. They clicked in such a dark raw manner and well the end was not good for them. I cant get over on how raw this relationship was. I still love how hope remians for them and I love how Violet changed him for the best and made him see the light in despite that dark void in him. This couple is the defintion of dark and pure rawness.

Draco and Hermione ( Harry Potter)

AAAAAHHHH, THIS SHIP, THE LEGIT GOOD GIRL FALLS IN LOVE WITH THE MYSTERIOUS BAD YET LOVING SOUL UNDERNEATH. ALL ROMANTIC DARK CLICHES COME ALIVE IN THIS SHIP FOR ME. I just feel that them as a couple would just be very attractive and really hot. As well as their differences are what struck me the most. Their personalities are miles apart from each other but there is this one common string that holds them together. It’s a string filled with intrigue, romance, passion, love, hate, and magic.

Jake and Amy (Brooklyn 99)

The progression of their relationship through the seasons, now that’s what I call progression successful. Their perks, differences, fun banters, competitions, the care and the bond that they had is so unique and special. They both are wondrous in their own ways and when combined, it’s really something unique.

Sheldon and Amy

This couple tho. Intially, I wasnt a fan of Amy making Sheldon more human because I loved the way Sheldon intially was, all robotic and all. But well, one of my friend made me understand on how she thought it was beautiful and well the character progression is really good in both of them. Amy changed Sheldon for the best and made him in touch with his emotions really well. They both are good for each other and the whole wedding process was really beautiful. I really dig ” Shamy”

Peter Hale and Lydia ( Teen Wolf)

I dont know, something about thier chemistry really just made me ship them. I really have no reason. It’s complicated.

Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone

DO I EVEN NEED TO TELL WHY?! ITS PRETTY DAMN OBVIOUS and seeing them in Amazing Spiderman just gave me all the damn feels!!!!!!

Zayn Malik and Lily Collins

Wattpad fan fictions have started making me ship this couple so much. That’s the only reason why I love this ship so much!!

On the top of my head, these are my main ships and I have so many more. I chose them because as a couple and an individual, I love these characters so much.

Some of the ships that I also love are as follows:

Harvey and Donna ( Suits )

Jacob and Renesemee (Twilight)

Jake and Melanie ( Sweet Home Alabama)

Oliver and Felicity ( Arrow)

Scott and Malia (Teen wolf)

Beck and Tori (Victorious)

Cat and Robbie (Victorious)

Jace and Clary ( Mortal Instruments)

AND SO MUCH MORE!!!!

These ships have it’s pros and cons effect on me. Looking at these ships, I often wish this is how my love life would be or the person who I want to be with could be. These ships set a canon of unrealistic expectations that ain’t gonna happen but I still have hope that I will find a relationship really unique that would make me happy.

I am still hung onto that but well one can always dream.

I feel that from these ships, I learn more about the complexities and depts of a relationship but also the simple things. It might not be the ideal way to learn, but I think you can learn from anything.

SHIPS ARE BASICALLY MY FAVOURITE THING IN THE WORLD AND GOSH I LOVE THEM. It gets me so excited!!!!

The life of a ship-lover is a never ending ride. The constant cycle of emotions and excitiement is a cycle I always look forward to.

In the moment

Monday, July 2nd, 2018          11: 21pm

I mentioned the time and date to state that this blog was an on spur feeling.

Got inspired to write this piece after watching Dear Zindagi, a brilliant and one of my favorite Hindi movies and also from Zindagi Na Milegi Doobara (ZNMD), that I am currently watching. Right now, the intro song is being played, and damn it’s a really motivating song and just flows into my mood right now.

Both these movies have excellent start casts and what just makes it better and so simple yet unique is the plot, the character development and the stories.

Then it got me thinking about my life, family and friends. How I wish to acquire certain traits of those characters and how I want to find friends like those. But then, I already know that I have found them. They have been with me my whole life, but you know I still can’t help but wonder about the movie characters and how splendid it would be to be a close tight group of friends with them. There is always a but lurking around, I am trying to let go of that but, but again it becomes hard, but I am trying. Eventually, it might fade away but it also might not.

The below two gifs are of Dear Zindagi and ZNMD respectively.

 

 

 

 

 

Right now the “cookie comedy scene” is going on and I have got to tell you it’s hilarious. I have got to try the trick sometimes. The trick is you tell someone that you know something about them and automatically all the secrets spill out like a water fountain!! I am laughing so hard at this scene and the dialogue delivery so much!!

I have had so many moments like these with my friends, not the tricky sort of thing but happy silly special goofy serious conversations and I am telling you, I wouldn’t trade it up ever. Those have made me who I am.

Sometimes, I wish some of the people I know could also see it but then well, I just don’t feel or connect with them that entire 100%. It’s not them. It’s me. You know what I mean right?

So after I had gone to uni, I have heard some pretty great stories from my various people and friends, when they ask me about the “great fun stories” I have had, I don’t have much to tell them because it’s nowhere near as bomb or exciting as their life stories. But you know what, that doesn’t make me upset of the fact that I don’t have such great stories to share.

In my own way and life, I have plenty of stories to share, I just don’t think those are the types you would particularly like or you might but well it just never comes up. I have shared some of them but to some people, it just doesn’t seem well exciting when compared. And honestly I kind of feel bad and sad for those kinds of people who think that life needs to be filled with exciting and big stories to bond over and talk about or to determine whether my life has been interesting or not. Maybe I haven’t seen a side to them that don’t think so but the side I have seen, well I am not a fan of it.

In my own little head, despite however small or big that story is, it is significant, and we shouldn’t be the judges to decide whether that qualifies as to how exciting or interesting or productive our lives have been.

For me, it’s the small moments, conversations I have with friends, the hangouts, the family talks, the small family stories and incidents, my cartoon watching obsession, my immaturity and small moments like these, watching movies and laughing, crying over them alone, with family and friends, travelling, creating up insane shit, writing and many more are my big stories. I am proud of it.

I wish I could tell it to them you know, but then I just can’t muster up the courage to tell them because I just don’t feel that close or real with them, but, when writing, it’s just so easy and different.

Words and feelings pour into this and I feel at peace. My mind is almost free because I write every thought that is popping into my brain and then my hands without thinking just write down every one of these thoughts onto this. You must have noticed, I said “almost free”, I said this because I am still on the firsts of opening up and learning to be not scared of the people/friends and their judgments/confrontations after reading this.

It’s going to be tough but I am trying to learn and be well more one step closer to trying to sort out myself. When I feel like just abandoning this train of sorting myself out, I am going to remind myself to come back and read this and understand why I decided to write and do this.

I was always serious about writing, but I was just too lazy and well I didn’t know exactly what to write about. I had different phases of writing, and they are all evident on my Instagram page, the page that shows an entire development of myself. That’s why I love my bio so much because it shows the growth of me as a person and well as a writer. One of the places where I can be myself and not be afraid, considering how ironic it is that many people follow and see this goofiness that in person with them, I cant give my 100% “Roshniness” to them.

At least I am glad that there are some very few people I could show it to and be like that. I am so thankful and happy for that.

So why I decided to write now?

Because I am ready and it feels right now. It feels relaxing to let it all flow into my writing. My thoughts are set free and well, I have been keeping things in way too long after I had gone to uni and this writing has started to feel like a new start to opening up and more like therapy for me as well. It feels meditating.

As I was reading through my piece, I didn’t justify or give you a proper reason as to why those movies inspired me to write this at this time while watching the movie right now.

It’s because there are some things that need to be done in the moment. This happened to be just one of those “in the moments”

I will tell you in more detail on why Dear Zindagi to me is a movie that just connect to me and why ZNMD makes me wish for certain things. Both these movies have a vibe and connect to them that I just feel at home at.

By now you will understand, my thoughts are like the wind, scattered all over the place and blowing in every different direction. Like the direction the way, it flows from slow to fast. It’s just unpredictable and sort of random. Again, just like how I feel and my thoughts. My thoughts jump from one cloud to another, each varying of a different topic and sometimes the same, just slightly different or maybe the same.

Actually, I will tell you right now on why those two movies especially Dear Zindagi hits me to the feels.

I believe that when one is in the zone, you should just let them flow with it and soak it in. Don’t interrupt them. Then you speak and then be in the zone. Let everyone be in the zone. ( It works differently in different situations and is also applicable in certain situations. You know when.)

The movie has no relation to my life whatsoever, but you know there is a special and different kind of connect that I get. I learned quite a lot from that movie and when I feel down, I sometimes watch that movie to well learn and be happy. The song ” Love you dear Zindagi” is the song that gives me genuine happiness and positivity. That song and the other songs and the movie itself does wonder to me.

Right now, in ZNMD, the diamond biscuit song is going to be sung in a few seconds and I can’t help but laugh because of a very fond memory that I had in school.

Why so, it’s because my friends and myself sang this song as a school project maybe in 8th grade. The same concept and tune. Gosh, it was so fun. When I still watch it, I laugh and cringe so much. Like that one more video ad comes to my mind, my 12th-grade marketing project about Netflix. The ad I made, god it was so awkward and made me, my partner, the class and my teacher laugh so hard that they watched it again because they couldn’t get over it.

See, these are the big stories and moments of life. It’s the everyday laughter and smiles that result to some of these big ones.

In ZNMD, the concept of friendship is what got to me the most, reminds me of my best friends from school, the ones that are always going to be my best special closestttttt friends and no one new ever has been added to that list despite the number of new good friends I have made. It’s just that group knows me in and out, and it just feels right being it that way. The song ” Paint it red” in ZNMD is just proving to be so nostalgic right now.

Right now, at this very moment, I am in my zone and there is nothing to stop the words to flow out from me. I am being free.

So as I was saying about ZNMD, that three friends reminds me of my special girls S and A, because I want to respect the privacy. So we all are the only children and my dad thinks that’s the way how we all became really close and just connected. Ever since 4th grade, we have become inseparable. I can’t remember exactly when we all just stuck and got together cause it’s honestly been ages and way too long. It’s still going strong. We have planned to do a trip like the one that they did in movies either to Shimla or somewhere else. Waiting for that “someday” to happen.

And like that pact, there is one more pact that I had made with my other group of musketeers, to sneak back to our old school grounds, sit on the fields, talk late in the night. I am waiting for that “someday” to happen as well with K,D and D.

Like that, I have a bucket list of moments and wishes I have. That’s for another time.

It’s 12:20 and I am going to stop writing now. Time for me to watch the rest of the movie.

See you soon, amigos!!

 

 

 

Those songs tho….

 

When I say music? I want you to think of the first word that pops up into your head.. DONT STOP TO THINK.

So have you thought of it? Now, I don’t know what you have in your mind, but when I say this, I hope you can all relate.

” Music is one of the forms of my therapy”

4dti

There are so many times when only songs have understood me. There are so many songs out there in the world for each one of your different moods. There exist playlists of songs for each mood. It’s all out there.

Some reasons as to why music is simply at it’s best?

  • The long midnight walks that I take with the city lights, stars and the night sky. Music has been my friend at those times and I find solace in it. With each step, beat and word, there is a feeling that cannot be dismissed. Sometimes it’s the dark fuzzy feelings that one occasionally get or the feeling of pure silence and then that song playing in your ears just pushes you to the edge.
  • Lying down on the grass, or in the middle of nowhere, just gazing upon the stars with that song playing. Holy Mamma, that’s a pretty good darn feeling. Everything just soaks and sinks in. All the feelings muster up and come to the surface. Then the feels hit you and emotions start to downpour.
  • We all have that one place, that place where we go to and all our troubles fade away into nothingness just for that while. I do have that place, a small hillside where I can see the city lights or sometimes it’s the high fire escapes that lets me see the night sky and city lights. What adds to that tranquility are the songs.  It feels comforting. One of the places I feel and know that I belong there and nothing could ever bother me.

 

 

 

 

  • During solo road trips and also during the road trips with friends, the songs that you sing aloud to on the radio or all of you taking chances to play each one your favorite song. Be it any case, but the memories created because of that sing-along moments, won’t you treasure it forever?
  • Songs many a time have helped me to block out fights at home. I sit in a room, plug-in my earphones and listen to the songs that help me escape the screaming wars. It does help for a certain time and then I am back to reality. But that little time is just enough to settle and help me.
  • Songs help me connect with many people and places. There are certain songs that help me cope up with homesickness. Sometimes, when certain songs play, I go back to where I heard the songs and the situations this song has been played in.

 

 

 

  • Listening to the songs that give me the vibes that I look for and need are the best ones to ever exist.
  • Many a time, for the fantasies and stories I create, I use a certain and quite a lot of songs for each mood and different plots because music helps to intesnify and make things a whole of lot of better. My mind creates these fantasies for me to escape reality and well some of them, because I know there are certain dreams and desires that can’t come true, so why not use the powerful tool we have? Our mind, because anything is possible in that tool of ours.

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  • The oldies are one of the best ones to exist. Reflecting back to those times where our parents used to sing along to them and to be honest, they have a really good feel to it.
  • And the songs of the 2000’s damn….. Pop culture simply at it’s best!! Played in every class parties and the radio. Dancing and singing to those hits have always been the joyous moments ever. Listening to them always brings back the nostalgia feel. (PS: Nothing ever stops me from cranking up these old tunes a notch and dancing and singing to them makes me a free bird!! Whipppeeee!!!)

 

 

 

  • Next comes Malayalam songs, gosh They always give me the damn feels every time, I am telling you, in order to bring out the true inner me/malu, just talk to me in Malayalam or play a bunch of malu songs, because that will never fail to unleash the BEASTTTTT!!!! And besides Malayalam songs help me to cope up with my homesickness and just brings me closer to home. They have a magic and spark in them which I can’t find in any other genre.

 

 

 

 

  • Hindi songs also have their moments for me, Gosh. They are the best ones to groove to. Like I said, it’s all about hitting the feels with some songs. It’s also what keeps me through the movies at times, the songs. ( PS: TRUST ME, I WANTED TO UPLOAD MORE GIFS, CAUSE THIS AINT ENOUGH TO REPRESENT BOLLYWOOD, BUT I WAS GOING INTO A CRAZY SPIRAL AFTER SEEING ARJUN RAMPAL AKA THE HOT MAN IN THE GLASSES, SO I HAD TO STOP BEFORE I WENT CO-CO CRAZY!!)

 

 

 

  • AND THENNNNNNN PA TA PA TA PAAAAAAAAAA, THEME/INSTRUMENTAL songs of tv shows and movies, god damnnnnnn!!!! THEY REMIND ME OF THE CRAZY FUN TIMES I USED TO WATCH AND GET SUCKED INTO FANDOMS, THEY ARE LIKE MY INDEPENDENCE SONGS, THE SONGS THAT GIVE YOU THE PROUD FEELING.

 

 

 

 

(CAN’T YOU HEAR THE SONG JUST BLASTING THROUGH THESE GIFS?!)

  • Music helps to connect with new people and also friends and family. Talking to my mom and dad on the music they listened to just makes me feel special. And when I am in those days where I miss them too much, I just listen to those songs and a few Malayalam songs because that’s home for me. Also, with new people and friends, its one of the best things to bond over. Those late night talks played along with some music. Damnnn… Bonding brooooo ( Kenny Sebastian Style)

 

 

 

  • It’s one of the best forms of self-expression and art. Through music, many issues can be raised and we get to know more about feelings and people. Each artist has their way of painting the picture with their music and lyrics.
  • I feel that music is poetry come to life. The lyrics are the captivating words and the beats and the creation is the life that the artist puts into it, to make it come alive.

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  • EDM tho!! That is my favorite. It’s just the beats. I can’t help but be moved every time. Some of my favorites are Night trouble, You and Sunset lover by Peti Biscuit. Those tracks get to me every single damn time. I don’t know why it just gets to me. Some form of magic does exist in that song. I know it and it undeniably can’t be resisted.
  • Discovering new music has a thrill and adventure in itself. You have no clue on what type of obsession and addiction you will get into next.
  • You can hide in these songs. They sort of protect you and know at what limits to stay. It’s a strange thing to say but I think you know what I mean.
  • One can know a lot about the person just by the music they listen to. It’s one of the secrets that hold the key to the mystery of unlocking that person.

LavishMindlessIberianmole-size_restricted  giphy-14

All of these and more are undoubtedly one of the best feelings in the world.

Below I will be attaching the two playlists which hold a part of me. I am hesitant to share it but I want you all to know me well.

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( PS: I change my mind… Ain’t uploading the playlists. I will share only 12 songs out of it. Not all, because who wouldn’t like to maintain that mystery/secrecy about them?!

And besides, I am playing it all risky putting 12 songs because you get to know a tad bit more and also I don’t want to conform to the rule of only 10. MEH, going all rogue.

Soooooooooo, okay here’s the deal, I just really liked these 2 songs and had to put it and I kind of like even numbers and putting everything on an even number. So that’s also there.

There you go, A Fun fact you have learned about me.

 

 

 

)

So, after a long tedious journey, I reveal the songs to you

Ava by Famy

Cool kids by Echosmith

Consequence by Notwist

Reykjavik by Brolin

Are you with me by Lost Frequencies

Lost it to trying by Son Lux

Speeding cars by Walking on cars

Talking body by Tove Lo

Blow your mind by Dua Lipa

Smoke and fire by Sabrina Carpenter

Given the chance by The Kite String Triangle

Stockholm syndrome by One Direction

Eventually I might share more but for now, that’s it.

Each of the song above tells a part of me or gives me the vibe that I need, want and require or each song gives me a memory of various emotions. The surface level is just a mirage to hide that complexion.

” There is too much beneath this complexity. Complexity is a beauty and art in itself. Not that simple is also less, simple isn’t boring. It’s just what I am not looking for.”

(PS: My first draft got deleted, now It’s my second time doing this, GAH and It also took me a lot of willpower to end this blog.)

So, PAPOYE people of the earth!!! ( PS: I know papoye means toy in minion language, but I don’t care and don’t you think it’s appropriate for bye bye or is it just me?! but that doesn’t mean I am gonna change it. So for me, it remains bye bye!!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi!!

To start off, my name is Roshni. And, its been quite some time I have had this thought of blogging in that head of mine. I was lazy the entire time and now I don’t know I just wanna do it because I am really passionate about this. And it’s better to start now than never.

I hope this energy lasts for a lifetime and not just for one week cause that’s how I am. (GREAT, FEW SENTENCES IN AND I AM ALREADY A WRECK.)

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Let me give you a small insight into how I am. This is an answer I struggle to come up with every time when people ask me to describe myself in a few words because few words are never enough to understand the complexities of a person.

So here goes nothing. Hi!!

I am a girl, that’s for starters. I am 19, afraid of turning older second by second. I love to swear and do swear quite a lot. Its registered in my daily system and I can’t seem to function without swearing at least once a day. I am Gemini and I relate to every character trait of my star sign and YES I DO BELIEVE IN HOROSCOPES AND A BIT OF superstitions. (PS: This is either going wonderful or down the drain)

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Now, I am slightly on the shy scale, not shy. I just have an immense dislike for the people of the world. There are certain types of people I am an extrovert to and to the rest of the world, I curl up in a corner and just listen and nod. I do talk as well but not as much as I like because where I am now, I just am not myself.

It’s not being fake if that’s whats going on in your mind. I am me, just not the happiest and slightly more real version I wish to be amongst those people.

I am in university in the UK thousands of miles away from home. Guess, that’s also a factor that goes into counting.

Let’s go back to the roots, shall we? I am from India, more specific, a state called Kerala, often called God’s own country, but I have spent my entire 18 years in the “GULF”, Dubai.

(PS: I often wonder why so, considering how the state and people are? But meh, I love being a mallu, That’s what we are called, MALLUS!! And the “GULF” thing is just another mallu thing!! )

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The first few years of my life, HOW DO I PUT THIS INTO WORDS YOU WILL UNDERSTAND?! Aaaaahh, yes I was a big-time BRAT!! So, as an only child, whatever things my dad used to buy, I used to show it off at school. ( The good old days of Hannah Montana and High School Musical stickers)
(PS: As you keep reading, you will understand how much of a DISNEY/NICKELODEON person I am and you will also see why..)

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After those bratty years faded away, then came the year of waterworks, The year where I cried for everything and became a tad too emotional. Let’s keep it short and brief: That was not a pretty year.

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Then came years 11 and 12, AKA THE BEST YEARS OF MY HIGH SCHOOL LIFE, where I had the chance to break free ( get it, high school musical, GABRIELLA AND TROY’S SONG, BREAKING FREE ) and become the person I always wanted to be. I was quite the extrovert, believe it or not. I was the school prefect, a student counselor, participated in talent shows and debates did impersonations mainly of Mr. Feeny from boy meets world, (a Disney show) for my friends. To put it in simple words, I was like Riley and Maya from Girl meets world (disney show) Every other day, I used to do some crazy shit.  Gosh, I had the best group of friends all my life and then uni came along. ( PS: I do have some really good friends in Uni but you know, I just can’t get to be myself around them, again: NOT BEING FAKE)

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I PRESENT TO YOU THE FEENY CALL, also I will show it to you sometime, LATAAAEERRR

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and then RILEY AND MAYA

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Uni came and then I kind of broke… I really wanted to go to India to study but my dad knew what’s best for me and shipped me off to the UK. Don’t get me wrong, I love studying and being there, its just that place is not me. I never was ready for the change and I still am not. India just spoke to me. I am studying English Literature & Language and I am so grateful to my father for sending me to the UK to study and I owe that to him. I have tried many new things and learned a lot about life, people and basically everything.

But it all came at a cost, I lost a huge part of myself after going there. I cried every day, I still do. It became too much. I just stopped becoming myself, not entirely, just not that real I used to be. Back home, I was the people person, loved making friends, loved just you know being loud and now, I am just not feeling it with anyone over there. Somewhere deep inside, I am slightly a bit unhappy. Now, I just am quiet, well not “quite quiet”. I just don’t know.

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I always felt India college life, like the movie Aaandam, that college life was what I wanted ( WELL THAT’S A MOVIE, YOU ALL WILL SAY, but still, somewhat like that) Cause all my friends who are in India well, they are just living that life I wanted and it kind of makes me sad.

I felt that was going to be better for me, in terms of people and basically the social life but then coming to think of it, its the education that matters and I am happy that my dad sent here. (PS: I have been saying this quite a lot, I don’t know if I am trying to convince myself. Like I said, I am still taking some time and adjusting to it.)

But really , I am so thankful and greatful to him and a bit happy cause the freedom to do anything MAHN, THATS THE BEST!!

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So what I want to say, is people and places change people. That’s the circle of life. ( I got this from an episode in Girl Meets World, a Disney show.) The UK and the people brought out another me, a me that is different from the real me, and Dubai and my friends brought out the real me. The me that I always want to be and I always am.

That me comes out when I am alone and when I am with certain friends. I love to dance and sing ( NOT GREAT AT IT AT ALL, COULDNT EVEN DO THAT FOR A LIVING IF IT COMES TO THAT) I love acting. I feel like I am good at it. I am a tad bit on the dramatic scale, like not the bad drama, the crazy Disney drama. I love me the person who I can be crazy and real with and also they should feel the same, and I am glad I have found some of them!!

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I LOVE CARTOONSSSS and let me tell you, no matter what, the cartoons of my generation are the best!! COURAGE THE COWARDLY DOG, JHONNY BRAVO, KIDS NEXT DOOR, MR BEAN, PAPOYE THE SAILOR MAN, there is just too much of goodness.

I AM GOOFY, WEIRD, SILLY, VERY CLUMSY. I like cooking a bit. I love to write and READDDDD!!! BOOKS AND FANDOMS ARE A HUGE PART OF ME!! TV SHOWS, MOVIES AND MUSIC HAVE SHAPED ME A LOT.

The above two paragraphs are for another time, cause if I start talking about that, I don’t think we will ever hear the end of it.

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What else I am missing in this character description?!

Aaaahhh, yes last but not the least, I love my family way too much and a few of my friends. I love memes, midnight talks and rides, music and walks in the dark. I want to travel to everywhere. I like to see the sunrise. I love those scenes like the ending of perks of being a wallflower and I deeply wish that would happen to me Someday. I love the supernatural stuff ( NOT GHOSTS/DEMONS) I am not a fan of confrontation and speaking the bitter truths. Sometimes, I have these dark messy thoughts in my brain and I like it cause there is a beauty in the dark.

I like to believe we all are different in our own ways. Sometimes unique, sometimes common. I believe in my faiths.

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So, on the top of my mind, I think I have covered the half of it. If there is more, well, I am not going anywhere any time soon or neither is this website.

So, bye folks, I hope you are not exhausted reading this. If you are, I sincerely apologize and now you know how the rest of my posts are gonna be.

 

To conclude, I am gonna end in a Bollywood filmy dialogue.

” Yeh toh sirf trailer hai, picture abhi baaki hai mere dost”

( Meaning: This is just the trailer, the movie is still left, my friend.)

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Bye!!