A week of philosophies, Day 6

This is a new thing that I am trying and focussing on.

Few philosophies that I like can resonate with, that can express my feelings or concepts that simply I needed to hear and be inspired by.

A week of philosophies. 7 different ways to look and learn about various aspects and views of life.

7 days to learn new, different 7 philosophies and incorporate these learnings into my life.

 

Day 6 September 16th 2018

Today’s philosophy: Karma

tumblr_ozybfaJwMj1weogo2o1_500.gif

What is Karma?

Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.

— Elbert Hubbard

“What goes around comes around.” That’s the basic rule of Karma. How Karma functions.

This use of the term suggests a lack of personal power or responsibility for being at both the cause and the effect of what occurs in one’s life. Using the phrase “it’s my karma” suggests victimhood, and karma is anything but victimhood.

Just as gravity is a law of the physical world, so is karma a law of the spiritual world. We are held responsible for our actions and, more precisely, for the intention of our actions. This responsibility exists within the context of an individual soul’s relationship with God. When one deliberately disobeys the will of God, karma is accrued. It is the intent of one’s actions that generate karma.

Why this scares and intrigues me?

Like gravity, karma is so basic we often don’t even notice it.

— Sakyong Mipham

To be punished or to be gifted for our actions and deeds.

I never believed in the whole Karma notion a few years back, but my good and wrong actions got what it deserved and gave me what I needed to have in a whole different way and story. It always did. Yet I never believed in it why?

When my friend told me about Karma, I still had a hard time believing it, but then I did a reflection on life and it’s workings. That’s when it hit me. It was there all this time. It really was there it really did exist.

This has now become a concept I truly believe in but also wonder why it works and exists. Both for good and bad. I often would wonder how the world would function if not for this.

Would people be pursuing the wrong actions and never get punished for it? What about the good folks, will they get what they deserve? How and why?

There are times when Karama has worked in the worst ways possible, and I wonder why. I wonder why for my family, friends and myself. What heinous actions have we done to deserve the worst? Is it because of the actions of our loved ones that affect us? Or are these the actions that we have committed unknowingly?

I often wonder why God would do this? Sometimes the struggles we are being put through, I wonder why. Did we do something in our past lives to deserve this? Or does it just happen?

 

The world works in it’s fine and mysterious ways that can sometimes kill or fix people.

tenor

 

But then it also worked in the most amazing best ways as possible. I am not a very bad person, okay maybe in the deepest corners of my soul, I do wish people that I don’t like or who have done the absolute worst to my family and me should deserve the worst, or they should get a taste of their own medicine. And boy oh boy, have they got it!!

BLuF

 

I have a love-hate relationship with this force. I can’t expect it to work in my favour at all times, but I also know that I can expect it to be my side and it will come to me when I deserve it.

So far, this year has given me all kinds of karma I deserved in both good and bad ways.

I often forget Karma at times and sometimes end up doing things that I am not so proud of and have also suffered from my actions in my own way.

tumblr_ob2qi8Yuj51r8570lo6_250.gif

 

If not now, then definitely later I have. Each bad and good story of my life teaches me different lessons and reminds me of one thing every time.

Things happen, sometimes they are meant to be and sometimes not. We should try to see the best in it, and also sometimes it’s okay we can’t adapt to it or see the best in everything. We should try. We should do good actions and deeds if we expect the world to be kind to us as well.

 

(A Special Thank You to this song for helping me out. Even though I didn’t understand some of the words in it, it still helped me connect more with Karma and also helped me write. So, Thank You for making this song. )

 

Quote to end the day with

A reminder to myself and to us all. Good actions get you good karma, and wrong actions get you the absolute worst from the lot. 

-Roshni Marath Jairaj

 

 

 

I am upset

July 30th, 2018 Monday, 9:55pm 

I am upset.

Yesterday, July 29th was the happiest day of my entire existence. I met my all time favorite actor and person who I deeply love and admire, Dulquer Salmaan, it was one of the most indescribable feelings ever, but that’s for another post. (That’s going to be a pretty huge one.)

Woke up at 6:30 in the morning, because well I slept early and daydreamed and woke up hungry because I didn’t eat anything after I met him or before I met him. So I was only surviving on half a meal on the day I met him. There lies the reason that woke me up, Hunger.

The day started with eating leftover KFC, checking out how many likes and comments I got, replied to each and every one of them.

A few hours into the day, I see a text in my social group that bothered and managed to break me from my most magical trance and awe of still meeting him. Initially, I thought my friends didn’t get and understand how huge of a deal it is to me, but then I came to an understanding that, there are problems that are big and your friends need you to be there. Reality came back to kick me again. All I wanted was for a day to be still stuck in that trance but that got cut short, but yet that trance and that feeling would always stay with me.

I know they understood it, just the moment and timing of all this was wrong. But somewhere deep in my heart, the feeling couldn’t be shaken off.

Sometimes, even the most magical, special and wondrous moments of your life can just break in a matter of seconds and you need to be okay with it. You deserve to feel upset and angry but remember,

Sometimes, it’s not all about you and your big moment, because there are problems happening with family, good friends and the world, and you need to be there and care for them despite how much you crave it all. You need to be the bigger person in that big mind of yours filled with many other opinions and voices saying you not to do and care for yourself. Don’t do it for others, do it for yourself. They have done it for you, now it’s your time.

Sometimes, you can’t use that as an excuse or go back into that protective cocoon of that moment. You need to face it and realize that moment will always stay with you but life will move on and if you choose to get stuck in that moment for too long, you might not catch up with life and might miss out on something important.

Sometimes you need all the help you can and sometimes despite all the help or no help, you need to face your stories and experiences alone.

Sometimes, the fundamental laws of baisc human nature and the laws you have made needs to be broken.

Sometimes.

I knew it wasn’t gonna last, but it was good and extremely beautiful while it lasted.

Then my day moved forward. I listened to my friend’s problems, I understood the pain and hardships my friend was facing and I understood why everything I experienced today had to happen. It was a lesson and a reminder in many ways.

The world is not as it seems, its a trick and a puzzle left for you to solve, you have to figure it all out, you can have help, but it’s you that needs to play the game of life.

Later, I caught up with my friend, talking to her felt great and well she has taught me a lot. Talking to her was the highlight of my day. That was a happy moment in my day. It’s been so long since talking to her, so when I talked to her, it felt fucking great. She understood how much the whole experience of meeting Dulquer meant to me and she could relate it as well because for her love for Beyonce. So, talking to her, I was able to once again bathe in the trance and the awestriking wonder for some time.

Later, much later into the day, I talked to my other friend who had the problem and learned a few things from her.

As night approached, that was when I officially claimed the title of being upset and sad. I can’t seem to catch a break, huh.

Tomorrow, I am supposed to go for a premiere for the movie, Cristopher Robin, and I was eagerly hoping for my dad to take me to the movie, but well at the last moment, life happened, job obligations, plans change.

I understand how difficult it is for him and the struggles he has to go through. Every single day, that fear does not leave me. Seeing him tensed, anxious and stressed every day is how my day always goes. When I am far away from them, it faded away but still keeps playing like a song that is stuck forever on loop. On top of that, other problems by him.

I know it’s selfish for me to still want my father to take me to the movie, but him dropping me there gives me a boost of confidence and well I did not want to be alone and lonely. I wanted him to be there and hug me. I just wanted him there.

My mom offered to accompany me a numerous amount of times, and trust me I wanted to say YES, but I didn’t want her to be all alone after I left, she is an innocent woman and well not familiar with the metro and everything. So whilst I was in the movie, I couldn’t bear the thought of my mom all alone sitting out in a corner in the big mall, So I said no but she still kept asking me and my answer still remained a firm no.

So I have learned that sometimes there are times and moments in life where you need to do things alone, despite the help you are going to get. If I would have said Yes to her request, what would I do the next time? I can’t always expect one of them especially my mom to be around.

So, I am learning. It’s really hard and trusts me, I want to give up, but I need to do this for myself.

And let alone this, my mother confides in me and shares some pretty upsetting news. Mahn, I really couldn’t seem to catch a break.

I am trying to get rid of this sadness, so I have decided to watch a movie, but couldn’t focus my mind on anything until I got it all out.

I didn’t want to upset my mom by telling all this, despite the number of times she has asked me why I was upset. Mothers, they know everything. Just watching my facial expressions, she understood that I was upset, but after a firm number of no’s, I think she finally understood to let it go. Or I might cry it all out in the night whilst hugging my mom and her comforting me.

I did say, I am trying to be strong, not greatly trying or succeeding, but still trying and learning.

I want to end this by quoting some lines of Riley Matthews from Girl Meets World from an episode Girl Meets Gravity. I don’t know if this contradicts the entire life lesson that I have just put for myself, but I felt it needed to be put in to remind myself and the world out there this one thing.

Riley Matthews: “The sun doesn’t go around the Earth. We are the ones moving. We orbit the sun because we need it. We need its light and its heat. And if it wasn’t there, we’d be dark and alone. We think that we are the center of the universe, but the truth is… we need to circle the ones we love for as long as they’re here. We need to hold them close because no matter how far we travel, they are the ones who hold us in place. It’s gravity, and without it, we’d just all float away from each other. We are not kings at all. We are just tiny little specs. That’s from “Our Town”, my father’s favorite play. Just for a moment, we’re all together. Let’s really look at one another.”

So, I guess what I am trying to say is we need to be there selves for each other and for ourselves. There are sometimes where we need to prioritize ourselves and there are sometimes where we need to prioritize our family, our friends, and the world. We should know when to do it. You can choose the way, there is always a choice and the consequences and the actions depend on that choice. It’s not a perfect world filled with perfect people.  The only thing you can choose is how you deal with it.

That wasn’t so hard after all, I guess I just needed to write everything down from scratch, read it and gain some perspective. On the contrary, it was kind of hard going through this whole process, sorting and understanding, but well it’s worth it and I got a life lesson out of it.

 

So, this comes to an end. I kind of feel better from my previous state, but still, can’t shake that big cloud of sadness pouring down on me. I really should get to my movie before it’s too late to start watching and then unwind down by some sleep and probably some really nice dreams cause I am in dire need of it.

I am upset -> I am becoming alright

 

The End

( I am not putting a full stop yet because my story and life don’t end here. Life has a lot to teach and offer. So I am looking forward to it and also not. It’s a long open-ended journey that I am scared and nervous about but can’t wait to explore, uncover and discover. It’s going to be a journey filled with different stories, emotions and feelings.)