Capturing it, Breathing it, Living it…

Everyone has those ways to keep hold of something that is close to their heart, a way to remember those moments, a way to go through it all over again. I love how it works. It’s unique to everyone.

Remembering every aspect and detail of those time, memory and moment evoke a different sense of emotion and remembrance.

I have my own ways of playing it back over and over. Sometimes, the details can get a bit hazy, but the memory, time, people, the emotions and the moment always remains the same.

I do it through writing, taking pictures and videos, music, movies and mostly by remembering it all and being in the moment.

 

– Sometimes, there won’t be times where one can quickly whip out a phone and capture the entire moment because sometimes it ruins it. Then also capturing it also helps with making it a memory for eternity.

 

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You don’t get to be in the moment and enjoy it wholly.  All you can do is pay attention to your phone, see it through that and well that frankly upsets me. I like seeing it alive and also record some bits of it. I get the best of both worlds. I want to cherish this moment forever but also see it forever.

Even if I don’t capture it, I will always remember it. But I would be guilty to admit that I wish I had some physical source of watching it again but I would not regret it.

Sometimes, taking videos and pictures is also one of the best ways. Being in the moment, capturing it, reliving it while playing it in the times ahead. Seeing how joyful it was back then.

There are pictures that I take by my friends because I want to remember it or just because I dress up once a rare while, the background looks good. So why not?

There are some moments meant to be captured, some to be enjoyed, some to be meant for both.

 

– Music and movies

 

 

Certain music reminds me of home, my friends, my family, the streets that I have walked through, the memories I have shared with that person who I listened to this music with, or danced to in parties.  The vibes and feelings I wish to have again and live through. It has no bounds.

The playlists I have curated from each memory and story are the ones that I absolutely live for. It’s something of my own, so personal, where each song tells the memories and the emotions. It absolutely is of utter sheer magic because it feels so warm and good to have something of your own in which you can record your moments of life.

Movies, I still remember how different movies I have watched with different people evoke various stories and emotions. Each story had a good memory of its own. The laughter, the tears, the discussions, the fangirling. It was a memory to die for.

In a way through that music and movies, they helped me capture some of the best memories to ever exist.

They make you feel so much more. It’s one of the most intense after effects you experience after reliving it. It all comes down at once and drowning in it is the best. 

Watching the movies and listening to the songs are another experience of its own, combined with it, the memories and the moments you have lived through them. It’s altogether a new found discovery and bliss. 

 

– Writing

 

 

The process that I always find myself falling in love with the most. It helps capture and recapture the feelings in your heart, body, and mind with words. I always find myself good with words. When I can’t get my thoughts straight, I write because it helps me sort out, think and ponder.

It gives me a new found courage and bravery to confront with myself, thoughts and address it. These words help hide my fear but also show it to me.

So when it comes to capturing and reliving it, writing down how I felt, the moment, the people and the world. I learn and understand how I felt through these stories. Writing helps me capture the feelings I experience whilst being in the story. Remembering them from my memories and writing it adds a different feel to it. When I compare what I wrote back then and now, I discover and learn how much has changed. I learn a lot about myself.

When I look back and read through it, the words help me get a deeper aspect.

 

I love to revisit some of the memories and stories I have lived through. They make me calm and happy. I do wish many times that I could go back to them but then I look forward to more good memories and have fun reliving and remembering the stories I had.

There are those nights where my mind keeps me awake and many of the times, it always goes through the routine of remembering many of the things that have played out in my life. 

Sometimes, I also revisit some of the bad moments gone through life to remind myself that bad times eventually do fade away, but they leave a mark. They either charge you for the good or for the bad.

Sometimes, I also remember the embarrassing ones, I do not know why I do, I just simply do.

So that’s it, folks

– Roshni Marath Jairaj

 

Movie Talks

A new series emerges again, a series where movies I watch inspire me and make me think about that the topic of the film and more.

Today’s thoughts are based on the movie, ” The Bridges of Madison County”. This movie is based on a novel.

Starring Clint Eastwood and Meryl Streep, it’s a beautiful well-thought movie that evokes loads of thoughts and feelings. It makes us think about the underlying feelings and emotions of love and family, and it’s complications.

How loving someone is so simple, but the relationship that comes along with it is complex. The mentalities of people, the responsibilities of having a family, the strains and limits that it takes on one, how difficult choices have to be made; ones that can even break you.

A love affair taken place in 4 days, 4 days that were of absolute bliss and perfection but it came crashing down when Francesca has to make a choice between her lover, Robert Kincaid and her family and children. It’s a tough movie to watch, and our hearts are always on the line with characters and the plot.

The end is a powerful and bold choice. She chooses to stay with her family, a sacrifice she made for her and her eternal love. She decides to keep her love aside and lived for the family, but she always loved him and will keep loving him. It’s a bittersweet ending.

It makes us wonder why couldn’t she leave her family and go with the man who makes her happy, the man who understood her, the man who she wanted to spend her life with.  A man who was kind and good of nature.

Love and connection like that only come once in a lifetime and she left that for her family. A great sacrifice indeed.

On the other hand, I do understand why she chooses her family. She knew she couldn’t leave her family behind, She would be leaving a whole other life she had back here to move on to a new different life. Responsibilities bound and kept her. I felt that she felt she owed it to them or maybe more, out of love but a different love, a love for the greater good of others.

I cannot stop wondering why she wouldn’t go with him? I also do understand why so she couldn’t go.

Why are families complex and robust? Why does one always have to sacrifice for the greater good? Why can’t one be selfish? But as you see once, one becomes selfish, so many lives are on the line. The lives you have interacted with and become a part of can be broken or are.

All it takes is a moment for an earth-shattering event to take place. A moment to make or break you.

Till the very end, I expected for a reunion, but I wasn’t given that. It got me thinking that’s just how some things in life are. Sometimes you don’t end up getting that. For some closure or out of pity, people tell change is good. Some change is good but what about the changes that we just cannot accept or fathom? We learn to be okay with it in the course of time.

We all live only once, why not do everything we love? We can but in this movie, she could but also couldn’t. Sometimes life gets in the manner and responsibilities, but we should and always ought to try our best in living the best lives.

Marriage is a respectable, caring loving yet a frightening institution, and along the fine lines comes the family. It still upsets me why she couldn’t leave, but as I said, I also understand why because I have seen it happen in real life but in a very different way.

It’s also the mentality of the minds that also got me about this movie, how we are raised to think of certain things and parts of life that are completely absurd and cannot be deemed as usual. We are expected to believe that life is some sort of routine and along with it comes certain expectations and moral are you are supposed to follow.

I do understand those morals have been established to ensure the happiness of the family and to keep it from falling apart but what happens if you are no longer happy?

What then? Are you allowed to leave it or continue living it for the family? Can you do both? But will they understand? Why isn’t there a fix to this? A protocol or a solution. Why do certain problems in the world that exist where answers cannot be found that makes everyone happy? Why must one get hurt and upset? Is this how the world functions and needs to work?

I do understand that there lie obligations, responsibilities and a life that you have build for yourself and your family, all on the verge, but if one isn’t happy with it, should we silently suffer for our loved ones, for the greater good? I know many people who have.

I know of many stories, but what I can’t find is a story that ends up with the person happy, with not many consequences, but I guess life is not a movie huh? Where one can direct and make it the way they wish to see.

We only live life once, and all this time, somewhere deep inside of us, we know we aren’t happy with it, but is it too late?

What if you realise that, at last, breathe of your life, you have a sudden epiphany that the life you have lived turned out to be the life you were never happy or genuinely joyous with. A life where one was unable to seek true happiness, joy and freedom. What happens then?

After we die, what happens? I don’t know.

Are our souls happy and finally free now that it’s over or will it be haunted by the life it never had and wished that it had? Will, our souls, roam around the face of the earth searching for that lost life or will it be lost forever without finding it? Will our souls depart from this earth after discovering what it always wanted or leave without finding it?

The answers are unknown, endless and of many.

 

I don’t know what will happen.

Probably I might have to be at my last breath to find out. 

 

I have many thoughts, many conflicting thoughts, many troubling choices and decisions lie ahead. For all of us, for me. I hope I can make the right choice without upsetting the world and myself.

I know for absoulte certainity that as the course lies ahead, I will be stuck at crosspaths, quite a lot of times. I do hope and pray that I can make decisions that will make me happy as well the people in it.

I also know that some or the majority of it might not be possible, but I am willing to try and not be afraid.

For the things that truly matter, I will fight. But if I loose? What can I do?

Perhaps I can be happy about the memory that it happened and then console myself by saying that certain things are not meant to be.

Countless other thoughts come into my mind and I cannot find an absoulute true answer that I want. There are always many sides to that thought.

I don’t know if I will ever find one clear answer to the thoughts and questions I have.  I do hope to find an answer that will make my mind at ease and heart at content.

Perhaps, maybe, there is not one clear answer but I do hope whatever I learn and whenever I learn will finally put me at contenment.

 

Or I might go searching for more?

The mind never stops working, does it?

 

 

4s85

 

The thing about yesterday

27th July 2018 Friday 2:00 PM 

It happened yesterday

It dawned upon me when I was sleeping

Nights always was and became the times for contemplation and hard truths

Soon, this month was going to end and the next month would dawn upon us in  a few days

Time to go back to university and to return to that life was hitting close now.

My mother was sleeping next to me and the thought of returning back shuddered me and I hugged her as tight as possible not wanting to let go.

I tried to close my eyes, empty my mind and sleep

I tried to think about things that made me laugh and of things that made me happy.

I tried to think of things that made me squeal with excitement and even the dark psychotic thoughts that made me want to kill the world

I tried to change the course of my mind’s direction through different ways but to no avail, it all eventually came down to the path of sadness and despair of leaving home and returning back to the “uni life”

I tried to hold it all in, the thought of leaving my mom, dad, my friends and my home.

I tried to contain it in. I really did try

I was a bomb that had to explode after all in order to contain myself

Then the tears started to flow down from my face bit by bit

Moments before it turned into an emotional breakdown, I once again hugged my mom tight, it was as if my brain was trying to remember and register even the tiniest of details about her before I leave.

I once again tried to stop the outburst but it was too late.

Mothers, they know everything

She sensed it all and asked whether I was crying

In my broken tiny voice, I simply answered no and then I proceeded to cry out loud and remained in her arms

She always knew what to say

She hugged me tightly, wiped my tears, told me what I needed to hear

I stayed in her arms crying for a long time

Crying and crying, I drifted off to sleep

I knew my cries and worries affected her, she always told me how bothered and upset she was when I cried

I always wondered what I would do without her, how I would live without her, all these thoughts deeply disturb me every day, I try not to think about it often but at every step in the walk of my life, that thought always lurks around me like a monster and a shadow never vowing to leave me ever.

All I could do is pray and pray.

She would do anything to see a smile on my face and for my future

She kept all her pains and troubles with her, very rarely does she show me her tears

She is a strong woman and I admire her so much

She is my strength and weakness

She does have her flaws, but after all, she is just human

No words could ever amount to the feelings I have for my mother

No words could ever capture the great deeds and things she has done for me and this family

I eagerly wait for that someday, a day where I can take my mother to a world only filled with happiness and joy.

She does justice to the word “mother”

We both are companions to each other

We both only have each other in this big world.

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Special mention: To all the mothers out there, without you, the world would be incomplete. 

Thank you for everything. 

Thank you Amma for being there. I love you

Feeling things

12:00 AM July 22nd, 2018

Quite a day, today was.

Screams of my mom and myself filled the air. The usual.

Emotions were thrown and hurled around.

Pains and misunderstandings were on the minds.

But as night dawned upon us, it faded away into nothingness.

Apologies and amends were made.

We returned back to the loving bunch we were.

Yet somewhere in our minds and hearts, the marks of it are always imprinted.

 

This day, I was made to feel different feelings and emotions from different sources. Every day, I do feel something or the other, but today was different, like some of those other days. 

Reading and watching “Call Me By Your Name” overwhelmed me with emotions. It made me understand more about love and the pains of it. The ending of the movie, it’s raw magnetism, the character breaking the fourth wall with its heart-wrenching tears and realization.

A Netflix movie “Margarita with a straw” made me vulnerable and emotional. I learned about difficulties, challenges and changes.

Again, Netflix does its miracles by throwing me into the jaws of a documentary, “Dark Tourist” I learned quite a lot about the dark culture of different countries and also the dangers of some. A very intriguing and new concept and to watch the journey unfold was quite the enjoyable time. Taught me a lot.

David does justice to the show as well as to himself. I found him to be the type of person I see myself becoming very close friends with. I would say some of the interests are not up my alley, but I wouldn’t mind friends who do it, because I would like to get into the brain and know all their experiences through them.

I also find his accent very energizing, interesting, unique yet calming. Not afraid to speak out what he feels about the experiences and I love the way he is not afraid to push his limits into trying something new. His commentary, never unnecessary, everything just plays out right.

We get to experience a lot through people like them. These kind of people are one of the wonders and miracles in this world.

David phrases it quite well in fact. His words on Dark Tourism is “Escaping normality to stumble onto something beautiful and unexpected. ”

One of the philosophies I keenly and heavily follow. I escape reality and go into my mind because it’s a world created by me to do anything I wish and desire. A world to come into when I am upset, happy, excited and much more feelings.

Out of this, I feel a lot of things, but nothing ever sad.

I am the audience and the actor in this movie of mine.

Something just for myself. A place to unleash my unwanted and wanted thoughts and dreams. 

It’s a world of mine where no one could ever tarnish or bring it to ruins with their words and self. A world just for me to devour.

How much ever I put it into words, it simply isn’t enough to describe how much it means to me and why. Maybe, sometimes no amount of words could equate to the feelings.

Everything in this world teaches us one thing or another. It’s always exciting to learn. A process I hope to never get tired of. 

 

 

 

Teaching and joys.

July 17th, Tuesday, 10:38 pm

It all happened as I was watching Star Wars: Episode 5- The Empire Strikes Back. It all happened in the blink of an eye. The question was popped up after a few moments the movie began.

A few moments into the movie, my mom pokes at me and tells, “my friend, asked me if I was on Instagram”, and well it got her thinking and finally, the moment happened!!

She asked me to make an account for her and teach all the basics and tricks. I have been begging and nagging my mom on making an account on Instagram and finally, that day has come!!

God how elated I was!! I was over the moon!!

I dropped everything all at once and went on to help her in this mission.

The joy and the curious look on my mother’s face was the world to me and my heart melted with joy and overwhelming cuteness when I saw my mother trying to learn the world and how everything she loved was in one platform.

We took it a step by step. I taught her all the basic functions of what each thing does. We followed all her favorite actors and things that she loved. We followed her friends as well. She was extremely happy and delighted.

A quick learner, in fact, she is. ( PS: Why does this sound like something Yoda would say? :} )

It was cute on how she got scared when she saw new follow requests. She looked up to me and told in a cute childlike manner that she got scared and did not know what to do.

At that moment, I felt like the mother in our dynamic and told her to be calm, think, and only be friends with people who she knows. I held her hand, kissed her forehead and told this was all a part of the process.

This learning process continues tomorrow as well.

I find her curiosity and surprise adorable and god in moments like these, I understand that there is so much out in the world that is new to her and I can’t wait to be the person to introduce her to all of it.

Every now and then, she checks on her phone, laughs, and giggles at the posts she sees. I can’t help but be softened by this.

Is this how feeling proud and happy feels? I think so.

My heart is all fuzzy and warm. It feels nice. Was this how all my mentors felt when they taught and shared knowledge?

I guess it differs to everyone. Like Corey Matthews once said, Teachers are the foundations of this world. I do believe it, because behind every student, there has to be come teacher who inpsired them to take what they are doing now or or atleast they might have inspired them in some way or the other.

If not, I do understand it.

Moments like these make me happy and are what I live for. Moments like these reassure me, even if today was a simple and a basic task, teaching is what I want to do in the future.

It gives me joy, happiness and I can’t wait to impart knowledge and be that teacher who brings new ideas to the class. I already have planned a list on what kind of a teacher I wish to be and there are also a list of teachers who inspire me. I have always taught students and kids and I know I can be a good teacher. This topic is for another post, someday.

Right now, All my mind can even focus on are on my mom and her immense happiness!! I am so proud of her!!

Now I have got to get back to my movie and poor R2, I love that robot!! Yoda and R2 tho!! Hillarious!! I love Yoda, Gawsh I love the robots, Chewbacca, and Yoda so much!!

Farewell and until next time!!

 

 

Amidst​ all the books.

I entered into a beautiful trap. It was a trap right from the start. I knew it but I went in.

At the entrance, it gave me a chance to let go of my worries and I hastily took it to enter the world of words.

Far away from all the crowd, I spotted a small bench and sat down amidst all the books. Every story looked towards me. Everything was within my reach. I felt at peace.

The covers of the book charmed me. I read them front and back. I felt excited!

I  looked and gazed at all the wonders the authors left for me. I fell into an enchanted trap.

Amidst the crowd, I held the two books that caught my eyes.

I sat down in a spot, far away from the eyes of the crowd. I gently opened the first page, admired it, flipped each page and thus I began to read.

After a short while, I looked up at the world around me and I saw it all.

Different worlds under one roof. Any book that I held in my hands, refused to let me go. I refused to be taken away from my world.

Once the thoughts tried to make its way back, I started to get back to my reading. The music played soothed me, yet I got worked up as each page turned by. Time seemed to halt for a long pause when I was here.

Hours could pass by and I never was aware, because it was all a part of an elaborate scheme in works. It was all a beautiful trick, a trick of feeding on my emotions until the very end.

I was oblivious to the happenings of the world and the crowd around me. This was a world where I was persuaded and allowed to take breaks from life.

Perhaps this was why it played its tricks, it could have been its way of acting out on the pain inflicted on taking some of its heart away. Or it wanted some of its heart to be taken away. It might have enjoyed it.

Two sides existed, one can never know which one it chose and which one it was forced to end up being. Or it could have ended up with its favorite choice as well.

This was a world where manipulations and trickery were at its level best and it worked its enchantment quite well.

Those who survived had a gleaming pride on their face because they got to take a huge portion of this world’s heart with them, and for those who couldn’t as much as they liked or couldn’t at all had their hearts toyed with, they had a sliver of hope yet were dismayed.

Over here, hope existed despite all the pain.

Despite all of it, this place took away my worries and sorrows.

It became a place to indulge my mind and heart with the world of others.

It was a place that took me to places further and beyond within and from this spot.

It soon became the time to leave.

The moment I stepped out of the exit, I was forced to head back to a world of ruins and mind succumbing thoughts.

To help cope up, I brought a part of it along with me. It wouldn’t last long, but I accepted it and held it in my hands. I kept it close to my heart vowing to never let go. I sniffed the pages and instantly, I was brought back to a world of beauty and tranquility.

I was a lost traveler until I stepped into your world. No questions arose when I came to you. You are a force that kept pulling me to you and I vow to always be in that loop.

Thank you and until next time.

( The featured image is taken by my dear Friend, Raveena.

This is one of the bookstores I love going to. I wrote this when I was here sitting on one of the spots with two books in my hand. Bookstores and libraries are where I feel at peace and at home. I have this dream when I own a house, a room dedicated just for my books and to every book out there. A room filled with treasures overlooking the view of the skies and tall scrapers and at night, I see all the city lights within the comfort of a book in my hand and some good music. )

Ships, a necessity​.

Ships, my absolute favorite thing in the world. Seeing the couple that I ship makes me so happy and excited!! It’s a different feeling altogether. I have always been a fan of shipping people that I see on shows and movies and even people in reality.

I also ship characters from different multiverses because sometimes, these characters just simply belong together. There is no explanation whatsoever. They just look good or they are similar to each other or it’s the vibes. I don’t know. It feels right.

Many of the ships I have usually never come true because well either the character doesn’t like them, or they die way too soon, or they are just in different shows and movies altogether. But they do come true through dedicated people who put efforts into making these ships happen in their videos.

I also ship characters from books but not as much as shows and movies, because shows and movies are like visual and with the actors acting, it makes it more real and with books, I always tend to focus on the characters and the plot soley. So even if there is romance, I do love it but well it’s different.

Why I suddenly decided to write this was because one of my favorite pass times is to watch videos of people wh I ship online and gosh it gives me hope and immense joy in the world. ( ps: I got inspired to write this after watching stiles and Maya)

The passion, the souls connecting and the music chosen for each ship is what gets me the most. Through such videos, I usually discover such great music and it makes me love my ship even more!!

Some of the ships that I will hardcore love, some of the ships are the ships that I loved at some point, some of them are the ships that I  deeply wish for them to come true are as follows!!! ( PS: I am already hyperventilating and freaking out and I barely haven’t even started writing.

You might also notice that I have used a lot of girl meets world and teen wolf, it’s because those two shows are the shows that I love the most and I find the characters so deep and complex, and through videos made by people, well that’s how many started.

I have also linked down the videos that made me fall in love with all these ships. And when I go back to see this  post, it’s going to fill my heart with John annd excitement of seeing everything I love in one page especially the videos )

“DRUM ROLL” And HERE YOU GO!!!

Stiles (Teen Wolf) And Maya ( Girl Meets World)

I feel that they need to be together because they both are so alike but yet so different. Sarcastic but different. Broken but different yet the same. They both have been hurt way too many times and when it comes to trusting people, they become kind of scared. They are both fragile in different manners. The term friendship means the whole world to them and they are ready to sacrifice anything. I feel that they both would help heal each other and also just be good for each other. Passionate, fun, loving and caring.

There is this one video on youtube that made me love them the most and that’s how I started to love them in the first place. The song used also had a huge impact because that’s one of my favorite songs because of the feelings it gives out.

Scott (Teen Wolf) and Riley ( Girl Meets World)

These two are so alike and sometimes, I find the resemblances shocking and also kind of cute. They always try to see the better in the world and they are filled with hope and faith of the world and the people in it. Friendship means the whole world to them, they are both goofy, silly and happy but at the same time, they are serious when they need to be. Sometimes opposites attract work and sometimes too many similarities would just ruin the spark, I honestly don’t know. It depends if you like the person and they like you and whether you guys can work it out and for a good reason, I know they can. They are good for each other.

The videos on youtube are how I discovered this ship. GAWSH IT’S PERFECT

Theo (Teen Wolf) and Maya ( Girl Meets World)

Honestly, both of them are so badass and I feel that they could challenge each other in different ways. They hardly have any similarities but the similarity that they do is what I feel that makes them different. They both have this danger vibe to their and their chemistry would be really good!!

Riley and Farkle ( Girl Meets Worlds)

THIS WAS THE SHIP THAT NEEDED TO HAPPEN. Both of them were perfect for each other. They understood each other so much and there were a whole other deep level and connection they had. They knew reach other right from the start and have been through it all. The small and the big moments they had were absolute bliss. Both of them goofy, weird, caring but miles apart in the way they think and feel. They both were genuinely good for each other and Gosh how I rooted for this couple to happen.

Josh And Maya (Girl Meets World)

Another couple that we didn’t get to see much of. Honestly, the physical chemistry is what got to me the most but also the talks they had. When they had the talks, damn it was good.

Stiles and Malia ( Teen Wolf)

At the first when they introduced Malia and I like how Stiles was the one to humanize her and teach her many things. Their bond was really good. It was good while it lasted.

Stiles and Lydia ( Teen Wolf)

Honestly, I started shipping them only the moment they had their first kiss in the locker room. The song ” Start Of Time” playing during the scene was how I fell in love with the couple. That was their song. The song was the one that did wonders to me in order to love the couple. They both were there for each other and saved each other many times. They both are smart. Lydia, a supernatural beautiful smart being, and Stiles, an ordinary sarcastic cute wonderful human. They deserve the world. Season 5 was the ultimate season for them.

Barry and Patty ( The Flash)

Gosh, they were so cute!! They both liked each other, had a great time, had a good level of understanding but Barry and his feelings for Iris screwed it up. God Damn, but at least he is happy now. Or is he??

Kara and Winn ( Supergirl )

The ship that I always shipped right from the beginning of the show. Winn is so adorable and the friendship they both shared just made me think about how good they would be if that friendship slowly progressed towards a romantic one. Yes, I do get that some characters are better off as friends and yes I do understand that concept but with Kara and Winn, it was different. I felt that he opened up to her a lot and well, they both look really cute together. Well, at least they are good friends now.

( SIGH )

Monica and Chandler ( Friends)

THIS RELATIONSHIP IS ABSOLUTELY PERFECT IN ALL MANNERS. How chandler handled Monica and he knew how to make her happy and found all her perks cute and handled them pretty damn well and Monica also knew how to cheer Chandler. The speech Chandler gave at the proposal and also to Erica about adopting the baby just made me fall in love with this couple and Chandler even more because it showed how much he truly cared for her and her happiness.

Ted and Tracy ( How I Met Your Mother)

Don’t even get me started on this. LIKE HOW COULD THEY DO THAT TO TRACY?!!! AFTER 9 SEASONS OF MYSTERY, ALL IT TOOK WAS 9 SECONDS FOR THEM TO DO THAT. LIKE WHY?! Tracy and Ted are the most perfect couple. Ted deserved her after all the struggles he went through to find ” THE ONE” AND SHE WAS IT!! She was this kind loving fun human with weird peculiar interests like Ted. The whole gang loved her and in a way she shaped and changed Barney also. They couldn’t be more perfect for each other and then BAM THAT END. FUCK IT.

I DISAPPROVE OF THIS ENDING HOW MUCH EVER YOU TELL ME LIFE IS NOT ALL RAINBOWS AND UNICORN AND WHAT NOT.

I clearly know that. That’s why I watch shows and movies to escape some of my reality cause they are my comfort zone and if you ruin my comfort zone, I can deal with it but just not with this couple.

I SIMPLY CAN’T……. It’s too hard.

Lily and Marshall ( Both from How I Met Your Mother)

The couple that went through it all together through thick and thin. Another couple that is just goals.

Steve and Diana ( Wonder Woman)

GAWD, THIS COUPLE HAD ME SOBBING. STILL SOBBING FROM THIS ONE. WHY DID THAT HAVE TO HAPPEN?! LIKE WHY????????? THEY JUST MET, CLICKED AND BAM, DEAD. NOOOO I WILL NOT ACCEPT THIS. THE CHEMISTRY, GOD DAMNNNN.!.!

Tate and Violet ( American Horror Story)

Oh my gawd, the feels that this couple gave to me. I have never seen any couple so intense and raw. Their character flaws and darkness was what made them “them”. They clicked in such a dark raw manner and well the end was not good for them. I cant get over on how raw this relationship was. I still love how hope remians for them and I love how Violet changed him for the best and made him see the light in despite that dark void in him. This couple is the defintion of dark and pure rawness.

Draco and Hermione ( Harry Potter)

AAAAAHHHH, THIS SHIP, THE LEGIT GOOD GIRL FALLS IN LOVE WITH THE MYSTERIOUS BAD YET LOVING SOUL UNDERNEATH. ALL ROMANTIC DARK CLICHES COME ALIVE IN THIS SHIP FOR ME. I just feel that them as a couple would just be very attractive and really hot. As well as their differences are what struck me the most. Their personalities are miles apart from each other but there is this one common string that holds them together. It’s a string filled with intrigue, romance, passion, love, hate, and magic.

Jake and Amy (Brooklyn 99)

The progression of their relationship through the seasons, now that’s what I call progression successful. Their perks, differences, fun banters, competitions, the care and the bond that they had is so unique and special. They both are wondrous in their own ways and when combined, it’s really something unique.

Sheldon and Amy

This couple tho. Intially, I wasnt a fan of Amy making Sheldon more human because I loved the way Sheldon intially was, all robotic and all. But well, one of my friend made me understand on how she thought it was beautiful and well the character progression is really good in both of them. Amy changed Sheldon for the best and made him in touch with his emotions really well. They both are good for each other and the whole wedding process was really beautiful. I really dig ” Shamy”

Peter Hale and Lydia ( Teen Wolf)

I dont know, something about thier chemistry really just made me ship them. I really have no reason. It’s complicated.

Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone

DO I EVEN NEED TO TELL WHY?! ITS PRETTY DAMN OBVIOUS and seeing them in Amazing Spiderman just gave me all the damn feels!!!!!!

Zayn Malik and Lily Collins

Wattpad fan fictions have started making me ship this couple so much. That’s the only reason why I love this ship so much!!

On the top of my head, these are my main ships and I have so many more. I chose them because as a couple and an individual, I love these characters so much.

Some of the ships that I also love are as follows:

Harvey and Donna ( Suits )

Jacob and Renesemee (Twilight)

Jake and Melanie ( Sweet Home Alabama)

Oliver and Felicity ( Arrow)

Scott and Malia (Teen wolf)

Beck and Tori (Victorious)

Cat and Robbie (Victorious)

Jace and Clary ( Mortal Instruments)

AND SO MUCH MORE!!!!

These ships have it’s pros and cons effect on me. Looking at these ships, I often wish this is how my love life would be or the person who I want to be with could be. These ships set a canon of unrealistic expectations that ain’t gonna happen but I still have hope that I will find a relationship really unique that would make me happy.

I am still hung onto that but well one can always dream.

I feel that from these ships, I learn more about the complexities and depts of a relationship but also the simple things. It might not be the ideal way to learn, but I think you can learn from anything.

SHIPS ARE BASICALLY MY FAVOURITE THING IN THE WORLD AND GOSH I LOVE THEM. It gets me so excited!!!!

The life of a ship-lover is a never ending ride. The constant cycle of emotions and excitiement is a cycle I always look forward to.