Breathing in.

” Never had I thought that the scents I would breathe in would someday become the dire drug my body needed in order to exist and often be used to rejuvenate myself back to life. This was that drug that needed to be taken in your life quite often to know that good and joy still exists. It’s a holy blessing.”

 

Disclaimer: Experiences might differ from one indivdiual to another

It was a normal day. Nothing ordinary out of the blue was going to make an entrance into my life.

Dad was coming back from Kerala, after his short visit. So the whole morning was dedicated to his coming. Mom finishing all her jobs in a panic and hurry was a sight my heavy heart had to witness every day. This routine was the usual dose a morning in this household could have. So far, no screams had been hurled because it was just the two of us for now.

I took my morning shower and then proceeded to help my mom ease the panic and the tension. So the first task of the day was to put the old newspapers out for recycling.

Taking the papers in my hand, as soon as I stepped out of the flat, the scent of the corridors eased my panic and helped me relax.

I was happy, I was the nostalgia happy.

For a brief moment, a short movie based on my memory of the happy days in Kerala played. The scent of the corridors took me back to the mornings of Kerala, at my mother’s place.

It started with a house beside the lake. Early mornings, I could hear the temple sermons and songs. That was how the small town woke up.

Later in the day, I could hear the birds chirp and that’s how I woke up. The curtains danced along to the wind, the sun rays lighted up the room and the breezy cold wind woke me up. This alarm clock was one of the world’s best invention and creation. It was my secret and also that of the town’s. It was solely ours.

My morning started with the scent of the warm milk my grandmother made for me.

Then later, the house was filled with the scent of flowers especially of Jasmine’s. We had a small garden at the back, so when we left the back doors open, the smell of that small garden and of the green plot would make its way into the house.

Soon, later in the day, my grandmother’s cooking would take up the scent of the air and it was one of the holiest smell I could ever remember.

Then as the morning events proceded, each scent would follow and arise from different tasks.

The washing of clothes and hanging it on the open terrace had a different smell of its own. I loved every aspect of it. Whilst hanging out the clothes on the terrace, I was gifted with the view of seeing my small town at it’s best every day till I left.

We always came during the monsoon reason, so when it rained. It was a bliss and an escape from the summer heat of Dubai.

When it rained, the drops that would hit the green trees, plants and leaves had a very pleasant smell of its own. The earthy smell when the rain poured down is a wonderful feeling and emotion. The raindrops danced on the roof and provided music to everyone’s ears.

Going through the events of the day, different smells and scents would fill up my nose and my mind.

The days of Kerala always carried the best scents and memories.

That was the end of the corridor whiff.

Now as I stepped into the house, another scent masked the house.

The scent of nostalgia masked again, something unexplained. Another array of nostalgic experiences masked me again.

The old memories of Dubai and Kerala, the memories of my family was dug deep from beneath my heart and was played in my mind.

The early mornings of school flashed through my mind, my mom getting ready to come along with me to bid a nice goodbye when I step on to the school bus. Then would come the afternoon where the fresh smell of my mother’s food would mask the entire house.

The afternoon naps, the tutions, the night rides and walks also decided to make its way into the movie being played in my head.

Then the good memories of the weekend also made its entry. Early morning fresh Agarbathi’s lighted by my dad and a nice temple song to wake me up.

It always fascinated me on how certain scents and smells could trigger some of the deepest fresh memories rooted in my mind.

What I have always liked about this entire process and creation was that none of the bad memories and events that took place in my entire life made even the slightest of guest experience in this head of mine when these scents evoked my memories. This was one of those experiences that had pure goodness and only contained happiness in them.

Later then, I would start missing it all but I was happy that I had these to cherish and they were only mine to be. I was happy and grateful that all of it happened.

How can those same whiffs of scents be recreated when I am at a place far far away from the source? How can these scents be recreated? Why do these scents play back those memories? How and why are always the two questions I have and I have never found a clear answer to it till this day.

This intrigues me.

Despite all my doubts and quests for an answer, The world is a wonder and so is the universe and the galaxy.

These are some of the mysterious workings of the world that I like and would always want as my constant wherever my life takes me and at any age.

 

Those songs tho….

 

When I say music? I want you to think of the first word that pops up into your head.. DONT STOP TO THINK.

So have you thought of it? Now, I don’t know what you have in your mind, but when I say this, I hope you can all relate.

” Music is one of the forms of my therapy”

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There are so many times when only songs have understood me. There are so many songs out there in the world for each one of your different moods. There exist playlists of songs for each mood. It’s all out there.

Some reasons as to why music is simply at it’s best?

  • The long midnight walks that I take with the city lights, stars and the night sky. Music has been my friend at those times and I find solace in it. With each step, beat and word, there is a feeling that cannot be dismissed. Sometimes it’s the dark fuzzy feelings that one occasionally get or the feeling of pure silence and then that song playing in your ears just pushes you to the edge.
  • Lying down on the grass, or in the middle of nowhere, just gazing upon the stars with that song playing. Holy Mamma, that’s a pretty good darn feeling. Everything just soaks and sinks in. All the feelings muster up and come to the surface. Then the feels hit you and emotions start to downpour.
  • We all have that one place, that place where we go to and all our troubles fade away into nothingness just for that while. I do have that place, a small hillside where I can see the city lights or sometimes it’s the high fire escapes that lets me see the night sky and city lights. What adds to that tranquility are the songs.  It feels comforting. One of the places I feel and know that I belong there and nothing could ever bother me.

 

 

 

 

  • During solo road trips and also during the road trips with friends, the songs that you sing aloud to on the radio or all of you taking chances to play each one your favorite song. Be it any case, but the memories created because of that sing-along moments, won’t you treasure it forever?
  • Songs many a time have helped me to block out fights at home. I sit in a room, plug-in my earphones and listen to the songs that help me escape the screaming wars. It does help for a certain time and then I am back to reality. But that little time is just enough to settle and help me.
  • Songs help me connect with many people and places. There are certain songs that help me cope up with homesickness. Sometimes, when certain songs play, I go back to where I heard the songs and the situations this song has been played in.

 

 

 

  • Listening to the songs that give me the vibes that I look for and need are the best ones to ever exist.
  • Many a time, for the fantasies and stories I create, I use a certain and quite a lot of songs for each mood and different plots because music helps to intesnify and make things a whole of lot of better. My mind creates these fantasies for me to escape reality and well some of them, because I know there are certain dreams and desires that can’t come true, so why not use the powerful tool we have? Our mind, because anything is possible in that tool of ours.

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  • The oldies are one of the best ones to exist. Reflecting back to those times where our parents used to sing along to them and to be honest, they have a really good feel to it.
  • And the songs of the 2000’s damn….. Pop culture simply at it’s best!! Played in every class parties and the radio. Dancing and singing to those hits have always been the joyous moments ever. Listening to them always brings back the nostalgia feel. (PS: Nothing ever stops me from cranking up these old tunes a notch and dancing and singing to them makes me a free bird!! Whipppeeee!!!)

 

 

 

  • Next comes Malayalam songs, gosh They always give me the damn feels every time, I am telling you, in order to bring out the true inner me/malu, just talk to me in Malayalam or play a bunch of malu songs, because that will never fail to unleash the BEASTTTTT!!!! And besides Malayalam songs help me to cope up with my homesickness and just brings me closer to home. They have a magic and spark in them which I can’t find in any other genre.

 

 

 

 

  • Hindi songs also have their moments for me, Gosh. They are the best ones to groove to. Like I said, it’s all about hitting the feels with some songs. It’s also what keeps me through the movies at times, the songs. ( PS: TRUST ME, I WANTED TO UPLOAD MORE GIFS, CAUSE THIS AINT ENOUGH TO REPRESENT BOLLYWOOD, BUT I WAS GOING INTO A CRAZY SPIRAL AFTER SEEING ARJUN RAMPAL AKA THE HOT MAN IN THE GLASSES, SO I HAD TO STOP BEFORE I WENT CO-CO CRAZY!!)

 

 

 

  • AND THENNNNNNN PA TA PA TA PAAAAAAAAAA, THEME/INSTRUMENTAL songs of tv shows and movies, god damnnnnnn!!!! THEY REMIND ME OF THE CRAZY FUN TIMES I USED TO WATCH AND GET SUCKED INTO FANDOMS, THEY ARE LIKE MY INDEPENDENCE SONGS, THE SONGS THAT GIVE YOU THE PROUD FEELING.

 

 

 

 

(CAN’T YOU HEAR THE SONG JUST BLASTING THROUGH THESE GIFS?!)

  • Music helps to connect with new people and also friends and family. Talking to my mom and dad on the music they listened to just makes me feel special. And when I am in those days where I miss them too much, I just listen to those songs and a few Malayalam songs because that’s home for me. Also, with new people and friends, its one of the best things to bond over. Those late night talks played along with some music. Damnnn… Bonding brooooo ( Kenny Sebastian Style)

 

 

 

  • It’s one of the best forms of self-expression and art. Through music, many issues can be raised and we get to know more about feelings and people. Each artist has their way of painting the picture with their music and lyrics.
  • I feel that music is poetry come to life. The lyrics are the captivating words and the beats and the creation is the life that the artist puts into it, to make it come alive.

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  • EDM tho!! That is my favorite. It’s just the beats. I can’t help but be moved every time. Some of my favorites are Night trouble, You and Sunset lover by Peti Biscuit. Those tracks get to me every single damn time. I don’t know why it just gets to me. Some form of magic does exist in that song. I know it and it undeniably can’t be resisted.
  • Discovering new music has a thrill and adventure in itself. You have no clue on what type of obsession and addiction you will get into next.
  • You can hide in these songs. They sort of protect you and know at what limits to stay. It’s a strange thing to say but I think you know what I mean.
  • One can know a lot about the person just by the music they listen to. It’s one of the secrets that hold the key to the mystery of unlocking that person.

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All of these and more are undoubtedly one of the best feelings in the world.

Below I will be attaching the two playlists which hold a part of me. I am hesitant to share it but I want you all to know me well.

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( PS: I change my mind… Ain’t uploading the playlists. I will share only 12 songs out of it. Not all, because who wouldn’t like to maintain that mystery/secrecy about them?!

And besides, I am playing it all risky putting 12 songs because you get to know a tad bit more and also I don’t want to conform to the rule of only 10. MEH, going all rogue.

Soooooooooo, okay here’s the deal, I just really liked these 2 songs and had to put it and I kind of like even numbers and putting everything on an even number. So that’s also there.

There you go, A Fun fact you have learned about me.

 

 

 

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So, after a long tedious journey, I reveal the songs to you

Ava by Famy

Cool kids by Echosmith

Consequence by Notwist

Reykjavik by Brolin

Are you with me by Lost Frequencies

Lost it to trying by Son Lux

Speeding cars by Walking on cars

Talking body by Tove Lo

Blow your mind by Dua Lipa

Smoke and fire by Sabrina Carpenter

Given the chance by The Kite String Triangle

Stockholm syndrome by One Direction

Eventually I might share more but for now, that’s it.

Each of the song above tells a part of me or gives me the vibe that I need, want and require or each song gives me a memory of various emotions. The surface level is just a mirage to hide that complexion.

” There is too much beneath this complexity. Complexity is a beauty and art in itself. Not that simple is also less, simple isn’t boring. It’s just what I am not looking for.”

(PS: My first draft got deleted, now It’s my second time doing this, GAH and It also took me a lot of willpower to end this blog.)

So, PAPOYE people of the earth!!! ( PS: I know papoye means toy in minion language, but I don’t care and don’t you think it’s appropriate for bye bye or is it just me?! but that doesn’t mean I am gonna change it. So for me, it remains bye bye!!)